


Until It's Gone

by threeofswords



Category: Dream SMP - Fandom, Minecraft (Video Game)
Genre: Depressed TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Exiled TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF), Ghost Jschlatt (Video Blogging RPF) - Freeform, Jschlatt Needs a Hug (Video Blogging RPF), Suicidal Thoughts, TommyInnit Needs a Hug (Video Blogging RPF)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-08
Updated: 2021-01-08
Packaged: 2021-03-12 04:42:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 898
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28629735
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/threeofswords/pseuds/threeofswords
Summary: Time and time again Tommy had found himself on that ledge gazing down into the bubbling lava.Time and time again he had stood, toes hanging over the edge, ready to let himself fall and yet something had always stopped him right before he could, be it another person or his own mind.But this was it. This was the one. He was ready.
Relationships: Jschlatt & TommyInnit (Video Blogging RPF)
Comments: 9
Kudos: 270





	Until It's Gone

Time and time again Tommy had found himself on that ledge gazing down into the bubbling lava.

Time and time again he had stood, toes hanging over the edge, ready to let himself fall and yet something had always stopped him right before he could, be it another person or his own mind.

But this was it. This was the one. He was ready. The L'Manberg people had organised some event and everyone was there. No one could stop him this time. 

He had decided to sit for a while, his legs dangling and the heat warming his bare feet. He thought about everything that had led him to this point. About Wilbur and the wars and the discs and Dream and…

And Tubbo. His friend. His best friend who had cast him out with no regard. Who no longer cared about him. Tubbo had been the only person he thought might have been sad if he jumped.

Since Dream had told him that Tubbo let his compass be destroyed, that opinion had changed. 

Tommy took a deep breath. It was time. He pulled up his right leg, moving to stand, but inhaled sharply as he felt a strong, cold hand clasp his shoulder.

"You're in my spot, kid." Tommy turned his head to look at the owner of the voice, the man that had interrupted him when he had been so close.

He was met with an all too familiar face. "Schlatt?". He looked mostly as Tommy remembered him if a little more casual; his formal suit had been traded for a dark blue sweater and jeans and his dress shoes for brown boots. He was pale, though not grey like Ghostbur, and his dark horns still curled at the sides of his head. An inky liquid, like black treacle, dripped from his mouth and his faded, ghostly eyes.

Schlatt's eyes. As soon as he met them it was as if Tommy could read his emotions exactly. A tidal wave of sadness and regret washed over him causing his chest to tighten. Tears pricked in the corners of his own eyes before he ripped them away, feeling sudden relief. 

"What are you doing here?" Schlatt asked, tapping the side of Tommy's arm, indicating for him to move over so he could join him on the ledge. His voice was softer than Tommy had ever heard it and the question had not seemed genuine or curious but more rhetorical and somewhat disappointed. Tommy shrugged, shaking his head earning a sigh from the ghost. "Is this really what you want?"

"I don't know what I want," he found his throat tight and his voice strained, "I just know that I don't wanna be here anymore. I know that no one cares."

He sighed again, "I don't think that's true."

"It is!" Tommy turned back to face him, this time simply allowing the other man's pain to combine with his own, "It is true. Even Tubbo doesn't care about me anymore. I'd rather just be a ghost like you and Wilbur."

"Trust me, kid, it's not all it's cracked up to be," his voice became somewhat harsher, almost as if he was angered by Tommy's suggestion.

"Why not? Seems good to me. I can do what I want and go where I want. Maybe I'll forget stuff too. Ghostbur seems happy enou-"

"Wilbur is lying to you!" He shouted suddenly. Tommy blinked at him, taken aback.

"What do you mean?" his voice was barely above a whisper.

Schlatt swallowed and turned back to the expanse of the nether before him. "He remembers everything. He's the same person, burdened with his guilt like I'm burdened with regret. Instead of facing it, apologising, trying to reconcile for what he did, he lied. He told you all he couldn't remember so he didn't have to own up to his mistakes. He even made that blue shit," he laughed shortly, "I don't even know what the fuck that is but it lets him siphon off some of the guilt so he doesn't even have to feel it."

"You're-... Why would he do that? How do you know?" He leaned closer to Schlatt who was still staring off into the distance.

"Because I was there when he woke up. It was in this clearing in a forest and I'd just been laying on the grass thinking about how much everything fucking hurt and I heard him. I helped him stand up and he knew me. He knew my name." After a pause, he faced Tommy, "Being dead is shit. You're gonna be sad and lonely forever. I spend every single day here or in the forest just… just hurting. You don't know what you have until it's gone, trust me. Don't waste your life, kid. Go home."

Schlatt's eyes left Tommy's once again, no longer even acknowledging the presence of the boy. He had said what he had to say. The two lingered there for what could have been an eternity sharing no words. Merely existing in silence.

At last, Tommy took a deep breath and stood up. He peered over the edge one final time, ultimately turning to leave. Before making his way back to the portal, he paused to say something but stopped himself. He took one last glance at the shadow of a man who remained on the ledge and stepped through.


End file.
